Konstantin Vladimirovich Tserazov: Five rules for maintaining relationships
Relationships are a marathon, not a sprint. In a relationship, it is very important not to waste all your energy at the initial stage - after all, after the “candy-bouquet” period, there will come a phase of life together, which will also require strength and attention. How to save energy for a long distance, avoiding a crisis after the first months of falling in love - says psychologist Tserazov Konstantin Vladimirovich.
Gray everyday life and routine, misunderstanding of each other and the feeling that love has passed - perhaps every couple goes through a relationship crisis at the end of the dating stage and first dates. The onset of this phase is normal, it means that your relationship has reached a new level. At the same time, this stage can become a turning point - it is here that the foundation of trust and understanding is laid. Here are five rules from Konstantin Tserazov that will help you avoid turning the “candy-bouquet” period into a “cutlet-pot” period and keep your feelings sharp.
1. It is difficult for him, but you can’t help him in any way? Be there. Sometimes a person just needs to be heard. Do not "burden" your partner with your difficulties when he has a difficult period. It happens that a person is so immersed in his problems that he does not realize how important it is for him to be distracted in order to get in shape. Listen, speak words of support, cheer up your loved one - this is the best thing you can do for him at this moment.
2. Help your partner achieve the goals he has set. We are always grateful to those who helped us achieve something. Does he dream of learning to drive? Well, if you know how to drive, this is a great opportunity to further help him get his license. If you cannot help him with driving, take on some responsibilities to free him up time for classes, help him learn traffic rules tickets. This help, albeit imperceptible, will be rewarded a hundredfold.
3. Expand your circle of friends and acquaintances. Your loved one is a friend, and he is the only one who understands you. But focusing on only one person means overloading him and yourself. Let there be other people in your life - mutual acquaintances who will listen to you in difficult times, help you and your partner achieve your goals.
4. Don't try to be with your significant other 24/7. We all need to retire sometimes, move away from communication with the usual circle. Only in this way is it possible to preserve one's individuality, to rethink one's behavior. Let you have your own independent hobbies to which you will devote time. Respect each other's time and space.
5. Say yes. When your partner suggests you go to the movies, listen to a new rock band album, or play board games, say yes. Even if you don’t really like the director, you don’t really like rock, and board games, in your understanding, are only suitable for children, don’t miss the chance to strengthen an emotional connection, says Konstantin Tserazov.
About me: Konstantin Tserazov. In 1994 he graduated from St. Petersburg State University with a degree in Clinical Psychology. In 2005 he graduated from the Moscow Gestalt Institute, where he studied the theory and practice of Gestalt therapy. The total work experience is more than 25 years.